Its been almost a month since I've written anything. Christmas and New Years came and went before I even realized. My break was amazing but I am very glad to be back at my own house. There's just something about having your own bed that makes it home. Things have been so crazy lately. School has started back and I am once again overwhelmed. I am taking psychology of learning, genomic biology, immunology, and biochemistry. I'm not sure how it will end up but I do know it is going to be a rough semester. Wrestling season is starting back up next week and I am really sturggling with what time I have to dedicate to what things in my life. Also, tomorrow starts 21 days of prayer and fasting at church. I am still struggling with what to fast. I've thought about a few different things but all of them just seem too normal and not personal. I cannot wait to see what God is going to do in these upcoming 3 weeks. It is so cool to know that so many people are fasting and spending so much quality time with Christ all at the same time. It is so encouraging. God is just really moving here in auburn. Church of the Highlands just started their college service called ONE on Thursday night. It was so awesome to be in a room full of people my same age who are seeking Christ when it is not the ordinary. every one of the people who came were there because they wanted to be there. Not because their mom and dad made them but because they wanted to encounter Jesus. It is just so refreshing to know that I am not alone in the life that I am living. God has a way of reminding me that he is always here right beside me. Whenever I am feeling so discouraged he shows me something or sends me someone to show me that it is ok. Me having the science oriented brain that I have, I do better with seeing things and proving them to understand them. Hebrews 11:1 says "Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." While I believe in God and I put my faith and my everything in him and him alone, sometimes my science brain gets the best of me and I start to ask why, or how, or why not. God knows this about me because he created me. He knows I need a little encouraging and even sometimes I need to be put in my place. He could do it in other ways but because he knows me to the core of my being, he knows how to get my attention and he knows how to SHOW me that he is loving me always. Just like people have different love languages within their earthly relationships, Christ has one with each and every one of us. He knows my love language and he is the absolute expert at it. I know it is old school but this song has just spoken to me lately.
Jesus, Lover of my soul,
Jesus, I will never let you go
You’ve taken me from the miry clay
You've set my feet upon the Rock,
and now i know
I love you, I need you,
Though my world may fall, I’ll never let you go
My Saviour, my closest friend,
I will worship you until the very end
I love Jesus and I will live for him because I know where he brought me from and I know that I cannot do it alone. No matter what happens in my life, I NEED him. It is not an option. I have to have him. I have to know him. I have to be captivated by him. His love is more than I could ever even begin to imagine.
