to the max.

Stress. the main word in my life at the moment. I cannot do anything this week but study. I have taken a few breaks and it has costed me. My week and the beginning of next week looks like this. Tuesday morning, Micro test. Tuesday night, Anatomy lab quiz. Thursday morning, Anatomy test. Thursday afternoon, Micro lab quiz. Friday morning, Spanish composition. Tuesday night, Anatomy lab practical. Wednesday morning, Spanish interview. And that is just the tests. I have homework everyday in some classes. All of that while trying to juggle commitments that I have made. I cannot even think straight. I have been to the point of tears 2 times already. This is madness. These are the times where it is extremely difficult to remind myself that this is worth it. I have to try my hardest to make good grades but when I have weeks like this, my test score cannot and will not depict what I actually could have learned given adequate time to prepare. Instead, I will probably do poorly on my anatomy test tomorrow seeing as how I have just begun studying for it. I haven't been on facebook for over a week now. That is crazy to me. It has been so good. People still don't really understand that I don't get on it at all. It really gives me alot more to talk about because I'm so out of the loop. But even being out of the loop girls still find ways to try to bring me into their drama. I however am having none if it. If you cannot talk to the person about your problem with them you sure shouldn't be talking to me about it. Sorry if this sounds very whiny but I don't have time to talk to real people so this is my venting. I feel like this week has made me seem uninterested and uncommited. I have has to miss things I normally would and need to be at. I have to remind myself that in this season of my life I am first and foremost a college student. Not a switch leader. Not a mat cat. Not a member of a small group. I am all of those things but only because I am at auburn...for school. It is so hard for me to put school first because it is the least fun out of everything that I do. Believe it or not, I do not enjoy school. It is also hard because I have found myself to be a "yes girl". I have a very hard time telling someone no when they ask things from me. I try to be super committed to everything but it comes down to the simple fact that I cannot be. I have to know when I can say yes and wehn I need to say no. I have been better at that this week since I am completely overwhelmed. Since I am stressed, I am getting easily aggravated at things that I normally would just brush off. I am normally a roll with the punches kind of girl so its weird for me.AHHH! I have a ton of things going on in my head and in my life right now and I just feel like I'm cracking under the pressure. Good thing I have a God who still loves me when I suck at life.