snowman

I finally uploaded my pictures so here is our Auburn snowman! war eagle! He has paintballs for a mouth, tennis balls covered with headphone pads for eyes, and brother's acne medicine for a nose. Ha! Can you tell we were unprepared for snowman building?

The puppies loved the snow.

The cats...not so much.

I hope everyone had a very merry and WHITE Christmas!

back

I came back to Auburn last night after spending 2 weeks at home. Being back here is bittersweet for me. I already miss my family so much. I do not like having to work the couple of weeks I am out of school. Oh well. It is life.

Christmas break (at home) was awesome. I got to see everyone I wanted to see (maybe not as much as I wanted to see them) and noone that I didn't. There are a few people I would rather not bump in to around Trussville. Wednesday my grandparents came to our house and we had tacos and opened presents. Very traditional. Christmas eve I went to Josh's house and did Christmas with his family. His mom got me this super cute bracelet that I am obsessed with. Then we went to his sister's house to see baby Caleb and give them their gifts. Josh's family is wonderful. That night we went to my grandmother's house for some Christmas eve games. A room full of 30 people playing Christmas games is a little crazy but so much fun. I got to use my new mixer to make desserts for the party :) Christmas day we woke up and opened presents. Then we went to Waffle House (welcome to Alabama). On the drive there it was snowing a little but immediately melting. On the way back, however, it was STICKING! We got probably 2 inches of snow! We made a snowman that was over 5 feet tall! It was crazy...snow on Christmas in Alabama. We spent the rest of the day watching Christmas movies and playing with our presents. Yesterday we went back to Granny's and gave gifts. I was supposed to work last night at 6 so I was going to have to leave early. I got  a text about an hour before I needed to leave town saying someone could work for me! GOD IS TOO GOOD! He knew I was stressed about leaving my family early. He knew I was dreading leaving in the middle of family Christmas. I still came back last night but I got to leave at 9 instead of 2! Merry Christmas!

Now I am back. Me and Josh both have to work this week so at least someone is in town with me. On a good note...my crazy roommate has officially MOVED OUT! Hooray! No more crazy...hopefully.

1 present

Tonight me and Josh went to Konomi (he has lived here a long time but never been) and then went to his house to exchange our Christmas presents. I thought I had done a good job of picking out presents I knew he wanted but wouldn't buy himself. He opened his and I was satisfied with my gifts. Then it was my turn. I only got one present. I had no clue what it was. I started unwrapping and HOLY CRAP! I unwrapped one of these babies!


Yep. The boy got me a KitchenAid.
I should have got him more presents! Haha. He is seriously THE BEST! I cannot wait to make all kinds of goodies. Since I burned out the motor on my hand mixer this beauty will be a nice replacement! THANK YOU JOSHUA! I love you and my mixer.

Meet Caleb

Caleb Dennis Griffin was finally born today! He weighed 9lbs 13 oz and he was 22 in long! holy cow he is a big boy and man is he cute!



His little cheeks are so chubby! My goodness. Joshua was instantly in love with the little man. And Tesney is obsessed with him. She wanted to hold him or kiss him or touch him every second. We even went home and colored some pictures for baby brother Caleb. He is beautiful. Congratulations Annilee!

copy cat

Tonight I went with Josh and his family to the Alabama Theatre. It was so much fun. Josh's uncle Doug and his friend came. His niece Tesney came too. The girl loves me. She is so stinking cute! I would venture to say she likes me more than she even likes her Uncle Josh. Tonight when she showed up she had a stick on rhinestone stuck right on her little nose. I have my nose pierced and so she wanted to have one too. It was seriously too cute. Then she made Josh ask me if I was wearing brown boots because she was. I wore black ones because I don't have brown ones but she still thought it was so cool that we were both wearing boots. She of course wanted to sit by me. I love that sweet girl. It just reminds me all the time that people are watching...even when you don't know it. Always reflect Christ. I absolutely cannot wait until Monday when we finally get to meet her brother Caleb!

falling

I LOVE this song! It is so true of our relationship with Christ. It has to be more than just something we are told to do. It is a relationship with a living God who can respond to us and become incredibly real in our lives. When it becomes that way we cannot help but fall in love.
More like falling in love: Jason Gray

Give me rules, I will break them
Show me lines, I will cross them
I need more than a truth to believe
I need a truth that lives, moves, and breathes
To sweep me off my feet

It's gotta be, more like falling in love
Than something to believe in
More like losing my heart
Than giving my allegiance
Caught up, called out
Come take a look at me now
It's like I'm falling, Ohhhh, It's like I'm falling in love

Give me words, I'll misuse them
Obligations, I'll missplace them
Cuz all religion ever made of me
Was just a sinner with a stone tied to my feet
It never set me free

It's gotta be, more like falling in love
Than something to believe in
More like losing my heart
Than giving my allegiance
Caught up, called out
Come take a look at me now
It's like I'm falling, It's like I'm falling in love

Love, Love, deeper and deeper
It was love that made me a believer
In more than a name, a faith, a creed
Falling in love with Jesus brought the change in me

RECAP: I am finally home for a couple of weeks. Lindsey and Allen's wedding was so precious. The food was divine, and the dancing was super fun. She looked amazing of course. It has been so so cold here! It snowed all day Sunday. We went to see my whole famaily in NorthPark's Christmas concert. It was so good. They dedicated it to Jake Richey. Please keep him and his family in your prayers. God is so big. He can work miracles. Yesterday I braved the cold and checked my brothers out of school and took them to lunch at Frontera and now Brian has the flu. Hopefully he didn't double dip in the salsa. I cleaned the house a little bit because I am a good daughter then hung out with Josh last night. I picked the boys up again today and my car had icicles hanging from it. It was freezing. Tonight I am going to dinner and shopping with Mom and Granny. Should be so much fun if we can manage to not freeze to death. It has been so good seeing my friends and family. We got our grades back and I got all As and Bs! Praise the Lord! He is truly amazing.

soapbox

Today I started reading through facebook statuses (more like stalking) and I came across a girl I used to be friends with in high school. We haven't really seen each other after graduation but we're friends on facebook. She now lives with her boyfriend and parties a lot. It just got me thinking. This girl's mom said probably more than once while we were friends that I was a bad influence. She was even "not allowed" to come over to my house. Then I thought of another parent who said I was a bad influence. This parent utterly embarrassed me when they asked me to leave their house while the rest of my friends got to stay and spend the night because I was "untrustworthy". Their daughter lived with her boyfriend for a while and also partied a lot. And yet another parent said that she and "more adults in the church" thought I was trouble. Her daughter now has a baby with a man who she is not in a relationship with because he is in a relationship with somone else. See a trend here?

I have never in my life been drunk, smoked a single cigarette, done any drugs except ones prescribed to me, had sex, or many other things that might could qualify someone as a "bad influence". Maybe before you go and try to blame problems with you or your children on someone else you take a step back and think about whether the problem is them...or you.

Matthew 7:3-5 “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye."

In high school I went to a club with 3 of my friends. We didn't dance with anyone, we didn't drink, and we got in legally. We didn't do anything wrong. However, we got a talking to from a couple of adults who thought that by us going we were wrong. I went to a boys room with a couple of my friends on a church trip to watch a movie when we were supposed to be in our rooms. We sat nowhere near each other. Apparently that makes someone completely untrustworhy. My "friend" told a boy something she did and HE told everyone else but then claimed I was spreading rumors about her and that makes ME bad enough for adults to think I am trouble.

It is interesting how people take a bad thing and make it define that person. They don't see all of the times I went to a bar or a party so that I could be someone's DD so they wouldn't kill themselves or others. They don't see all the mission trips I have been on to spread the Gospel. They don't see all of the small groups I have either led or been a part of. They don't see all of the high school girls that I have spent so much time praying over and praying with. Those things are completely irrelevant to them. But not to Christ. The things that I did for people to consider me a bad person were completely wiped away (if they were ever written in the first place) and are as far as the East is from the West.

Believe it or not, I am a pretty good person despite all of the haters. Sure I make mistakes but I have a God for that. I don't need people who barely know me to tell me who or what I am. That is a right that only Christ has. He will be the only one who will ever be able to define me. Ephesians 3:12 "In him and through faith in him we may approach God with freedom and confidence." I know who I am and I believe in Christ Jesus and I live everyday by faith in Him. I will answer to Him for any missteps I make make along the way. Not to anyone of this world.

Sorry, I will get off my soapbox.

the ship

HOLY COW! Auburn won the SEC Championship and now we're headed to Glendale for THE Championship! I can't believe it. I just booked mine and Josh's flights and our hotel room in Arizona! I think my dad is going to try to go with us. Then of course whoever else we can squeeze into the room we will. We don't know if we have tickets to the game for cheap or if we'll have to pay a boat load. But for Auburn this is pretty much once in a lifetime so we're going no matter what. Of course because of the game I got NO studying done so that will be my life for the next few days. Let me know if you're going to be in Glendale Arizona on January 10th 2011 because I will be :)

amazeballs

Tomorrow is our last day of classes. I cannot believe it. All that stands between me and Christmas break(and a good night's rest) is 3 finals and my OSCE. I started thinking back on the semester today and I realized I have just seen so much of Christ in the past couple of months. I have seen his obvious work in my life. I saw first hand God working things together for my good. I know that this is God's plan for my life and I have been able to give Him all the glory. Every single step that got me to this point has been all Christ and because I am so incredibly blessed I can't help but turn it right back to Him. I am sure you all know my Mammalian saga. I found out I got that D in the Spring and bawled. I talked to the teacher and was stuck with my 69.5 and I bawled again. Numerous times during the summer I cried until my head hurt because I just knew I couldn't handle the work load ahead of me because I was so discouraged because of that grade. I worked so hard to come up 3 points short. I was angry, hurt, and felt cheated. 3 points was all I needed and the teacher didn't care one bit. Josh encouraged me and told me I could do it but I just thought "that is easy for you to say. you have no idea. you don't have to take this whole super hard class again". I literally couldn't even talk about it without crying.

But God had bigger and better. He showed me so much of Himself and His love for me through that whole experience. I have seen something I thought was just so terrible, turned so good. God completely flipped the switch. I see others who are also repeating the class still struggling and I have gone from a D to an A. There is no way I can claim that. I am not doing it at the expense of my other classes either. I am doing well in everything. I have all As and Bs. You may think I am dumb but I havent been able to say that about ANY semester of college. I started off with a C in Comp I and I was doomed. I am in complete awe of God's love for me. I am incredibly blessed. I have an awesome family who loves and supports me. I have an amazing boyfriend who encourages me and believes in me even when I don't believe in myself. I have the best friends who give me comic relief. I absolutely cannot complain but even better I can't help but give praise to God for it all.
Even though this semester is coming to an end, I can't wait to see what God has in store for me. I am positive it will be amazeballs :)

time flies

This past week has absolutely FLOWN by. I took a couple of books home convincing myself I was going to hunker down a day or two at the Trussville Public Library and get some stuff done. Yeah right. That was a complete waste of space in my suitcase. Good intentions I guess. Since we had a test on Friday night I didnt do any packing before then. I spent Friday night packing and putting up all of our Christmas decorations. My roommate Kim cracks me up at the amount of Christmas decorations (and other holiday decorations) she has. She pulled a trunk out of her closet and started pulling stuff out! We got our tree up and our lights and stockings hung. Santa would be impressed :) I woke up early Saturday morning and loaded the cra and headed home. Saturday was Kayla and Chad's wedding. It was seriously one of the sweetest weddings I have ever been to. It was definitely God-centered and precious. She looked absolutely amazing. Congratulations Mrs. Bates! Sunday night we went to my old church. Both of my grandmothers had a little concert. For those of you who don't know, my grandmothers have been best friends since before my parents even started dating. Their choir show was precious. Memaw even had a solo. Of course we went to Habaneros to celebrate. Josh amazed everyone by ordering super hot salsa while everyone else got mild. He is crazy like that. Monday I just hung out at home with my parents and my brothers. They were all off  work and out of school so we just watched TV, played games, and just hung out all day. Tuesday me, mom, and brothers went to lunch and shopping with Granny and then Stacie and I went to see Mel at her new job. Of all of my friends, I would least expect Mel to get a second job. But that is just what she has done so hopefully she loves it! Wednesday we went to get Thanksgiving decorations because we had my grandparents over for dinner. Spaghetti for pre-Thanksgiving. Delish. On Thanksgiving day we went to Granny's for too much of her amazing food. Then we painted door hangers. Last year we painted nutcrackers and Granny liked it so much she decided to make it a tradition! Then we played our family's annual Turkey Bowl. I scored 3 touchdowns! There is an upside to being a giant! Then Me and Josh went back to his house to visit with his family for a little bit. Finally, on Friday, we went to Tuscaloosa for the Iron Bowl. Andy and Garrett went with us and we had a really good time! It was such an exciting game...well the 2nd half. We pulled it off and now it is on to South Carolina, again. War Eagle! I drove back to Auburn this morning and Toomer's was completely covered with toilet paper. It goes all the way down the street. Amazing.

My break was much needed and much enjoyed. Now I have to focus on the next 2 weeks. It could quite possibly be the most stressful 2 weeks of my life. Bring it on Harrison.

war eagle

We won the West! We're going to the SEC championship! Atlanta will turn orange in December. The Georgia game was probably one of the most fun games I have been to. It was exciting. It was emotional. It was awesome. After the clock went to 0:00 the fans and the students stayed in the stadium to celebrate. We stayed for a while. They played this video in the middle of it all.

War Eagle.
It has really been a fun season so far and it isn't even over. Stupid Georgia fans set the TP at Toomer's on fire. Way to be like the Alabama fans.

Now there is only Alabama left. Everyone seems to think we are going to lose. Well I say let them think that because it is when we're expected to lose that we win big. We got put into a lottery to get tickets to the SEC championship and then the bowl game that we go to (hopefully it is the one in Glendale!) I am praying I get both...is that selfish?   :)

almost there

Today is ONE MONTH until we are done with our first semester of pharmacy school. I cannot believe it is so close to being over. School has been going so great. I got another A on my mammalian test. Tomorrow we have a bonus test because everyone else in the class did terrible. I was 1 of 9 people to get a 90 or above out of about 150 people. God is too amazing. I got a 59 on this same test the first time I took it. Christ never ceases to amaze me at His control over everything in my life. In between now and Christmas break, we have a ton to do. We have 2 tests next week. Then I will have to do a little bit of studying over Thanksgiving break because I have 2 tests the week after and then finals the next week. However, I am going to enjoy that time off. I cannot wait to see my family and my friends! Kayla's wedding is that Saturday too. I cannot wait to see her marry Chad (expecially at the Alabama Theater) Me and Josh also have Iron Bowl tickets so we will be in Tuscaloosa (yuck) that Friday. Hopefully we won't regret that decision. Haha. I have been to Tuscaloosa a lot but I have never actually gone to a game. Hopefully WE will be the ones yelling our version of Rammer Jammer inside the stadium. After Thanksgiving break we have 1 week of class and then finals. Then I finally get to go home for a couple of weeks. I get to see Ashley Mills at Lindsey and Allen's wedding. I can't wait for that wedding too! I love weddings. I tear up at every one. I am such a sap. Ha! Maybe I will be able to keep it together at my own. I guess we'll see in a few years.

patients

I am getting ready to go on 2 patient visits today. I seriously have been blessed by the patients we go see every week. Thay really are 2 of the cutest sweetest little women on the planet. I love going to see them. You can really tell they benefit from not only the pharmacy part of it but aslo from the company. I love putting in the hour every week.

On another note, both me and josh have pulled a muscle in our backs. We are a sad sight to see. I have to work 10 hours this weekend and can't find someone to cover (which means standing for 10 hours aka hurting back) so pray I make it.

today

I don't have time for a huge post tonight so I will keep it short.

WAR EAGLE

Kim's parents came today and fixed us a delicious lunch. Josh had people over to watch the game and he smoked us some barbecue and made his very own barbecue sauce. He is a pro. And of course we went up to Toomer's to celebrate beating the rebel black bears and breaking the #1 curse. I did absolutely no studying whatsoever. Tomorrow will be my catch-up day.

la la la

I just got a ton of new music and so I figured I would share a few of my recent favorites. Click on the song title for a video.

Top 15: (in no particular order)
1) Freedom Is Here--Hillsong United
2) If This Was a Movie--Taylor Swift
3) My King Is Here--Highlands Worship
4) 2012--Jay Sean
5) Turn Back Around--Lucy Schwartz
6) Sweet Disposition--Temper Trap
7) If I Die Young--The Band Perry
8) Teenage Dream--Katy Perry
9) Just The Way You Are--Bruno Mars
10)You Do The Same For Me--Dave Barnes
11) Come On Get Higher--Matt Nathanson
12) Never Alone--Lady Antebellum
13) 10,00 Children--Dave Barnes
14) Sing My Lonesome Away--Matt Wertz
15) Last Kiss--Taylor Swift

These are all songs I think you need to have in your repertoire. Some don't have real videos because they're just that cool. Hope you enjoy.

bake fail

I had another baking fail yesterday. I love love love to bake. I am normally pretty good at it. When I bring things to parties people try it just because I brought it. However, I am glad I was only making this for my roommates and not planning on taking it anywhere. I tried to make Poke Cake. You know the cake where it has like jello seeped into it and it is just delicious? Mine was not good. It is edible, but nowhere close to being what it was supposed to be. I followed directions but when i went to pour the jello it just went all over the cake so instead of white cake with strawberry drips we have strawberry cake. I guess it turned out better than the petit fours which i tumped right into the garbage can but I was still disappointed. I am making mini crescent roll pizzas for my PPE meeting on Wednesday so that should go alot better. I just kinda played one day and made the recipe up and the roommates loved them so I figured I would make something I was sure I couldn't mess up.

On a better note....WE ARE  #1! We beat LSWho and sent the corndogs all the way back to LOSE-iana! It was a really fun game to be at. We sat with Josh's friend Andy and his brother and my roommate Kim. My mom, dad, brother Brian, and my memaw all came to the game too so it was good to see them. And BONUS Lauren Huff was in town! You will survive in DC for 6 more months I promise. We all went to roll Toomer's to celebrate. It was a long day but it was a much needed break after our super hard DAD test on Friday.

Oscar the Grouch is now officially an Auburn resident. I couldn't give him up.Isn't he a cutie?!

And last but not least...go by Taylor Swift's new album Speak Now. It is seriously so great.

fostering

I am a new foster mom to 4 precious kittens. Josh's roommate's girlfriend got them from a lady she works with. Since I am a crazy cat lady at heart, I took them in. They're about 5 weeks old and they are the cutest little things. They were all pretty scared when we first got them but even just a few short days later they have gotten so much better. Last night if they made any noise, I woke up. I was worried about them. They are all snuggling with me as I write this. I wish I could keep them all but I know I can't.

We got our mammalian test back on Monday and I got an A! The first time I took the class I was never even close to an A. This time I owned it. plus I have more bonus points this go round. While I absolutely hate having to hike across campus and go to the class all over again or having to stop studying for DAD to study for mammalian, I am seeing so much blessing in all of it. Because I am doing so much better, I am going to have a higher gpa to start off pharmacy school. If I would have gotten a C in the spring I would have a C for my gpa this fall. Instead I will have a B possibly an A. That is a big deal. I am staying on top of everything even though I am taking more hours than some people. I will also be better prepared for next semester when everyone has 18 hours not just me. The people who are only taking DAD will have to adjust to studying for 2 huge classes but I will already be in the swing of doing that. God really knows what He is doing and no matter how much we dislike it at any point along the way, He works all things together for good. He knew I could do it and he knew I would be blessed by it. I did not like it. I still don't. But I do see Christ all over every aspect of my pharmacy school career.

p.s. I cannot wait to see Jackass 3D. Every time I see the previews I get more and more excited. I just wish my mom lived in town so she could go see it with me since she loves the other 2 movies :) I have a pretty awesome mother.

weekEND

This weekend was a perfect football weekend. Auburn won (ugly but still a win) and Alabama lost (to a team we have already beaten). I couldn't contain my excitement. I have WAY too many friends who go for bama to not get pure joy out of them losing from the very beginning to a team we beat. Auburn fans are not South Carolina fans or whoever fans. We're just anti-bama fans. I witnessed it all behind the pharmacy counter. Thank goodness I work at a ballin CVS that has a flat screen tv just for football weekends. It is well worth the $7 I chipped in for it. Getting to watch the games and make a ton of money at the same time....perfect.

Tomorrow is not a school holiday for Auburn so my weekend ends tonight which stinks. I think if the bank is closed school should be too. I have a full 2 weeks from now until my next huge test so if you need me I will be at the pharmacy building. The day of that test my wonderful friend and old roomie Lauren Huff is coming all the way back from Washington DC to visit! She lovessssss LSU so I am sure she will be decked out in all of her gear. I CANNOT wait to see her! I am so glad that I dont have to spend the weekend studying so we can hang out the whole time she is here. I can't wait to spend some time with the Huff family. It has been way too long since I have seen Ronnie :) Hurry up and get here Huffy!

to study or not to study

I did it! I pricked my own finger. I did it myself and then my partner did it to me. It was not as terrible as I thought it would be but I still was freaking out right up until having to push the button to poke the needle. But good news...I don't have diabetes :) I am very healthy. And while pricking myself my lab partner told me that people with my blood type have the longest life expectancy. He told me I should live to be over 90. I am pretty sure he doesn't know when I am going to die but just knowing I have the probability of living longer than most people is pretty neat.

This past weekend was so great. We played one of those teams you know you're going to beat so most people go home that weekend. Well I stayed here and pretty much my whole family came to Auburn! We litterally got a table for 16 people at the restaurant. Even though it wasn't everyone, it was wonderful to see my family. They are the part I don't like about living 2 hours away and being in pharmacy school now. I have to miss family birthday parties and all of that most of the time. Those of you who know me at all know that I have a SUPER close family and if there is ever something that you get together for, we do. I know it can be overwhelming. I had to kind of warn Josh before he met the craziness. He fits right in now though. Thanks goodness for facebook. I can even keep up with my poppa and granny(yes my grandfather is on facebook). I am beyond blessed with a wonderful, huge, loud, loving, Christian, fabulous family. Even though I had to study a ton this weekend, it made for a nice little study break.

Speaking of study breaks...I have absolutely no motivation to study right now. Last night Josh took me on a little date night so of course I hung out with him the rest of the night instead of studying. Then today is my long school day so I got home and was pooped. We have a test in the morning so a lack of motivation is probably not great. Since I am blogging instead of studying it must still be an issue.

Continue to keep the Graves family in your prayers. The viewing for the mother and father was tonight and their funeral is tomorrow. Praying for God's amazing peace.

whew

Yesterday, a couple from back home died in a motorcycle accident. They have 3 children that are now without both of their parents. Please keep the Graves family in your prayers. John 14:27 "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."

School is going by so fast. There is not much time for a break. I have taken at least one test for all of my classes this semester. Some turned out better than others but all in all I am making it. God is too awesome. There was one test I did not do as well as I had hoped. Then the teacher randomly decides to give us a 10 point bonus test. God never ceases to amaze me. It is absolutely incredible how much He shows up in my life. I keep saying it but He got me in and I have absolute faith He will get me through it if I put in my part of the work. He has so far and I do not see it changing anytime soon.

This week in our CAPP lab, we have to learn how to use blood glucose meters. This means we have to prick our fingers. This COMPLETELY freaks me out! When I give blood, it makes me more nervous and hurts more for them to prick my finger than shove a needle into my arm. And the thought of having to do it to myself is almost too much to handle. I have to do it again for our finals for a grade and I am probably going to get a bad grade because I am so scared to prick my own finger. I am dreading Wednesday. We got to use our stethoscopes a couple of weeks ago because we learned how to do blood pressure. It was a little hard to get the hang of. I am pretty much a pro now so let me take yo pressure :)

Shoutout to Joshua Dale. I was home and he has a loud truck and somehow he managed to sneak to my house and leave me a surprise that he made me. Perfect ending to a stressful day. He is the best.

worn out

These past couple of weeks have been ROUGH. I have had a Mammalian test (which I actually did great on) and our very first DAD test is Friday night. For those of you who have no clue what DAD is, it is a huge class called Drugs and Diseases and we have this class every semester for the next 2 years. This test we have on Friday is literally 17 chapters. I have a 2 inch binder FULL of notes that are all on this one test. It is pretty much Organic Chem I and II shoved into 4 weeks. Being someone who did not understand one thing in Organic when I took it in undergrad....I have been studying quite a bit. I am blaming that for the reason I haven't written a blog in a while. I have been at the school studying more than I have ever studied for anything in my life. Now, because I am running on almost no sleep, my immune system is ticked. I guess my screaming at the game Saturday (war eagle) triggered some sickness. It started as a scratchy throat and now it is a full blown congested, coughing, painful, thing. I can't really take medicine, or at least I am scared to take any, becauseI have to stay up and study and the medicines I actually need are going to make me sleepy so I am suffering through it with the help of anything warm I can eat or drink. Needless to say I am ready for Friday night to be over with. I need to just get some rest and right now I can't really do that. Then Saturday I have to start it all again because Monday we have a CAPP midterm and another Mammalian test in a week. I know that this is the life I signed up for, but my brain just might need a break. I am living for Christmas break. By then I am sure I will be COMPLETELY worn out.

war eagle

FOOTBALL! It is FINALLY that time of year again! I will be spending the whole day....working. All weekend I will be holding it down at good ole CVS. Tonight, all day tomorrow and Sunday, and Monday night I will be making dollars. One positive is that it is usually DEAD on gameday and we have a flat screen tv in our waiting area so I won't miss that much. Even though I will not physically be at the game I will most definitely be there in spirit and I will be (silently) cheering the whole time. Josh has to work too. We actually have the same weekend schedule so we can go to the games together. I am amazed since we work at 2 different stores that it just happened that way. We are also going to go to the Mississippi State (that's the correct spelling for all you bama fans) game on Thursday. It is going to be a loooooong day but now is the time do things like that.

I believe in Auburn and love it. War eagle.

sweet little patient

I found out today that I get to go to my first patient visit this Thursday! I am excited and so nervous at the same time. I just feel so overwhelmed because I don't know a thing about drugs or very much about getting patient history. But I find comfort in the fact that I can talk to a tree so I will talk to them if thats all I can do. Of course I won't be able to post details or HIPPA will be knocking on my front door but I am pretty stinking excited! I hope its a sweet little patient. I don't know if i can handle mean ones this week :)

dislike

Have you ever been in a situation where no matter what you do, someone is determined to dislike you? Even the lack of doing something is doing something bad? No amount of talking, or not talking, or being honest can change the way this person feels about you? I for sure have. I am right now. I have tried everything I know to do to make the situation better and its actually not any better at all. It might even be worse than before I started trying to make it better. It is so aggravating and discouraging at the same time. I forgive this person for everything they've done but they still go out of their way to be rude to me (more than others). It is so difficult to live around every single day. Romans 12:18 says, "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone". I am encouraged that the first part of that verse is included. IF it is possible, as far as it depends on YOU....I can only take responsibility for my own actions. If the person refuses to believe that I am not out to get them,  then there may not be much more I can do than to continue to pray and try to be nice. I am going to choose to obey the golden rule in Luke 6:31 "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you". The Lord will judge me for my actions and that person for theirs. I love Jesus and I am going to make a choice to act like it.
When God is your reason for loving, your ability to love is guaranteed.

highlight

Today was the first morning of pharmacy school that I considered skipping. I didn't...but I REALLY wanted to. I was so sleepy this morning for some reason and it was so tempting. There's just something about being able to watch class on video anytime I want that makes sleeping in seem like a good option. I am actually getting so much of my work done before it is due. I am even going to SI for the first time ever. I hope I see some good grades to show off my hard work. I am in mammalian all over again because...we all know that story. Every single day sitting in class, I am just so angry that I have to be there. I am so mad at Dr. Wit because of his unfairness, his rudeness, his whole attitude. And knowing I have to sit and listen to him for another semester makes me so ill. Maybe one day I will get over it...maybe.

I am off to go study a little more and then get some rest. I got some new highlighters so I am ready to mark all over my notes! It is pretty sad when the highlight of my day is just that.

parting is such sweet sorrow

Today I woke up SUPER early and drove to Trussville for Josh's grandmother's funeral. It was such a good service. I had to hold back my tears for sure. There is such a peace in knowing that Mawmaw Holderfield is in Heaven with Jesus. Right where she has wanted to be her whole life. Please continue to pray for all of the family. I cannot imagine what it is like to lose a parent or even a grandparent. God will be glorified through the life that she lived. It was great though because I got to meet some of Josh's family that they don't get to see very much at all. It was great to hear all kinds of stories about mawmaw that I hadn't heard. She will obviously be very missed.

Pharmacy school is already feeling a little overwhelming. I just can feel things starting to pile up on me and I am getting nervous. I am trying to stay on top of it to the best of my ability. I already feel like I need 6 naps a day. I will get through it though. God has seen me through so much already that I have no doubts that if I put in the work, I will be rewarded. God is too good.

tear

Josh's grandmother passed away today. She was so stinkin sweet. It makes me so sad. Times like this make me glad that I am a girl. I would have had a couple of good cries and gotten out my emotions but Josh is a guy and thats not how they work. Hopefully his family will wait until Saturday to have the funeral so both of can go and not miss school. I am trying my hardest to be supportive and comforting so I really want to be there for him. It was so hard when I couldn't go to his grandfather's funeral earlier this year. Just keep him and his family in your prayers as they go through this rough time.

Club Target

Since the freshman are just moving in, this week is Welcome Week. I never go to any events. Even when I was a freshman, I just never went to anything. This year its totally different. I went to fan day yesterday with Josh and my family. Then tonight we went to Target after hours (10:30 when they close at 10). It was a complete success. I went because I needed to get a few more shirts for pharmacy school. We got there a few minutes early and there was a huge line waiting outside. They were handing out free cokes and coupons books. Since I haven't had a coke since January 1st, I took the coupons. Once we got inside it was like Club Target. They had music playing, a DJ, free samples...it was craziness. I looked around a little bit for some clothes and got some things for our 2 year scrapbook. Then once we were leaving they gave us all goodie bags. I have to give it up to Target for the quality of the bags. There was everything from tampons, to colgate wisps, to 5 gum, to combos. There was even 4 different kinds of deoderant. It was probably the best goodie bag that I have ever gotten. It was a good little experience to have with the roomies, Josh, and Vince.

The last time I went to the doctor, She told me I had a heart murmur. I have to go back in tomorrow to get an EKG. Even though its not a big deal, I am still a little nervous. I am making Josh go with me to hold my hand :)  Just keep me in your prayers tomorrow at 1:30.

baggage

This is a little lengthy and a little honest so bear with me. This morning we all went to Church of the Highlands here in Auburn. My cousin Tyler just moved to Auburn (sweet freshman) so he tagged along to try it out. The message was just so amazing. We are doing a series called Baggage. It is all about how everyone has things that they carry around with them that just weigh them down and make the journey through life more difficult. Today's message was about relational baggage(some sort of deep hurt that we suffered and has even come to define us). We read this story in Genesis that is literally 6 verses long. It is Genesis 11:27-28;31-32. "This is the account of Terah. Terah became the father of Abram, Nahor and Haran. And Haran became the father of Lot. While his father Terah was still alive, Haran died in Ur of the Chaldeans, in the land of his birth...Terah took his son Abram, his grandson Lot son of Haran, and his daughter-in-law Sarai, the wife of his son Abram, and together they set out from Ur of the Chaldeans to go to Canaan. But when they came to Haran, they settled there. Terah lived 205 years, and he died in Haran."
I probably NEVER would have caught the point of this story. Terah's son HARAN died. God must have called him to go to Canaan for him to just pack up his family and go. However, on the way He went through a town called HARAN and he settled there and even died there. He could not get over the death of his son. To get from where he was to where God called him to be he had to get through that baggage. Terah never let go of that and it kept him from God's potential. That is the last time he is mentioned in the Bible. The point of this message was that Relational baggage keeps us from our potential and can also destroy our relationship with God. Every attack of the enemy is to keep you from your purpose. Pastor Chris also talked about how the relational baggage that we carry cant be healed until we release the people involved. Our relationship with people and Christ is inseparable. Jesus said "You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: Love your neighbor as yourself." Matthew 22:37-39. You have to love God AND love people. This is where it hit me like a brick in my forehead. Do I always love people? Do I forgive others the way that I want God to forgive me? I know the answer to that is a big fat no. There is one person in particular that I just cannot stand to even think about. They did and do things sometimes that just make me so angry I could hit something. Some of the things hurt me emotionally and some of them just make me mad as a fellow Christian. The biggest reason I don't like them is most definitely my relational baggage. I won't go into details but lets just say I cried over this thing and I still get very emotional if I talk about it. So this morning I was forced to ask myself...does this thing with this person keep me from what God wants to do with and through me? The answer could possibly be yes. This person could quite possibly have their own relational baggage because of me. I have no idea. But I am right now revealing the hurt, releasing the people involved, and refocusing on God's plan for my life. Job 11:13-16 says "Put your heart right, reach out to God...then face the world again, firm and courageous. Then all your troubles will fade from your memory, like floods that are past and remembered no more." That is solid right there.

shady golf

We discovered the world of USA Mini Golf last night. My parents and brothers were in town so we were trying to find something fun to do instead of just watching a movie or something. I had heard of it from my friend at church so we decided that we should try it out. We got some not so great directions and headed out. We got there and it was SO shady. It was pretty dark and we were the only people there. Once we got inside it wasn't too much better. It was most definitely shady but I had a blast! It is blacklight putt putt at night. Every hole is a different city in the US so they're all decorated differently. They even have little trivia questions about each city. Josh beat me by 1 so I came in dead last. Haha! It was really really fun. Thank you Opelika for a good family outing.

Rx for tissues

Today at orientation we watched the saddest movie! It was called Taking Chance. It was a true story about a 20 year old guy named Chance Phelps who was killed in Iraq. He was a marine and the movie was all about the process of getting him from iraq, cleaned up, and transported back to his family. Kevin Bacon was the main actor in it. It was an HBO movie but I hadn't heard of it. While we were watching it I basically forgot I was in a lecture hall with 150 people. I felt like I was in my living room watching it. You can look at more of his story on wikipedia here. There is also a link to the actual transcript written by Chance's military escort, Lt Col Strobl (Kevin Bacon's character). It was a VERY good movie but VERY sad. I recommend it but I also would precribe tissues :)

Day 1

Day 1 of pharmacy school is officially in the books. We got there a little early and me, Kim, Kira, Saige, Josh, and Vince all got to sit together. They gave us these huge packets of notes and readings. It was one of the longest and most boring days that I have had in a LONG time. I had no idea it was going to be that brutal. They did lectures on everything from how to use email and search engines to history of pharmacy. All I can say is that I am glad that's over and that we only have a couple of days left until we start real school. Now I am off to do my homework.

its official

Saturday night we went to the ATL to go to Medieval Times. I went to one years ago on choir tour with church but Josh had never been. After seeing it on cake boss I thought it would be a good surprise but of course he figured it out. It was alot of fun though. We had a fun little car ride out there, we went through the dungeon, and got slushies. We went for the red knight and he was awful. He lost right away. But we still had a great time. Then Sunday, I woke up with about 20 red bites on my legs. I still have no idea what they're from. I had a slight freak out since I had to wear a dress for graduation. But I got to spend time with my friend Amanda that went to Brazil with me last May. She was in Auburn for the weekend and I am so glad I got to see her. We had such a blast at church and at Earthfare. I tried one of their smoothies with the stuff that turns it all green and I might just be hooked. Then last night me, Kim, and Claire went to see Charlie St. Cloud as one last little roommate outing before Claire moved. It was SO GOOD! I cried within 5 minutes. I have to give it to Zac Efron. His acting was great. Go see it. The rest of Sunday I was cooking or cleaning.

As of about 3:45 today I am officially an Auburn University graduate! Some of my family came into town for the occasion (when I say some I mean half and that is still 14 people). We went to El Dorado for some yummy Mexican and presents.  Then it was off to the ceremony. It was so exciting! Josh was a trooper and sat through it all, and on his birthday nonetheless. I saw a lot of people that I didn't even know were graduating. Even sweet Katie Brock. Too bad I didn't get to see her little man Caleb. Some of my family that couldn't make it even got to watch it live online. Isn't technology just wonderful? After it was over we had some people over to our house because Claire, my roommate, graduated too. I made some delicious food and its almost all gone (thank goodness). We had pepperoni dip, homemade ranch dip, honeybun cake, and red velvet cake. Since today was also Joshua's 23rd birthday, I made him a homemade red velvet cake with cream cheese buttercream icing and I guess everyone liked it because its almost gone. I personally don't like red velvet cake nor do I like cream cheese icing. I made it just because Josh loves it and it is his birthday so he gets to decide. That's love.

Tomorrow is the big day. Day 1 of the next 4 years. Pharmacy school orientation starts at 8:00 in the morning. I am so excited to meet everyone and get a feel for what my life will be like for the next part of my education. I even get to order my stethoscope and blood pressure cuff this week. I cannot wait. Doctorate...here I come. I have to go to sleep now so I don't sleep through my first day as a professional student :)

p.s. Josh has my camera so I'll post a few pictures later.

lesson learned

I think I may have a stalker. An internet stalker that is. I guess I should consider it a good thing. After all, imitation is the highest form of flattery :) This person just does everything I am doing (that i post on this blog). Its weird and aggravating at times but I am going to look at the glass half full. Thank you blog stalker. I like that you think the things I do are cool enough to copy.

Last night I attempted to make petit fours. Mrs. Prissy, Ashley's mom, makes the best petit fours that I have ever had in my life. Instead of just asking her for the recipe, I found one online on cooks.com. I have gotten some good recipes off of there before. It sounded pretty legit so I figured I would try it. I bought all of the fixings and set out to make them last night. They were HORRIBLE! I haven't had very much bad luck in my baking but this was a disaster. I had high hopes after that delicious cake with almond buttercream icing but I was severely let down. The cake was pretty decent by itself but I definitely wouldn't call it delish. The icing was hard as a rock. It was like chewing candy on top of cake. I literally took the plates of them and dumped them in the trash. I finally did what I should have done in the first place and asked for the recipe. "You have not because you ask not". James 4:2. I learned my lesson.

Tomorrow I am going to try to make a red velvet cake for Josh's birthday. Noone I know has a recipe so this is the best I've got. Hopefully it won't be a disaster too.

above and beyond

Wednesday morning I took my last final of undergrad ever. While it is exciting for now, I know that I have 4 more years of finals ahead of me. Going into the test, I only needed a 40 to get a B or a 95 to get an A. Needless to say I was only aiming for the 40. We had an optional 4th test that we could take just in case we didn't make what we needed on the final. I turned in my test and the teacher graded it and told me that I got a 70. He said I could take the 4th test and try to get a 94 for an A. I told him that I was good with my B. He looked at me so strange and I left satisfied with the grade.After all, I am only trying to graduate, not keep up my gpa. It got me thinking. How often do we do that with Christ? He shows us an opportunity to be more, to do  more for Him and we choose not to do it because we are satisfied with where we are. We can go further but we didn't aim high so we are perfectly content with staying right where we thought we should be. Whether it is because we don't think that we're prepared to do the something extra, or we don't think we have the skills necessary we remain stagnant. He has been showing me this recently while I have been praying about Uganda. The thought of going to a foreign country for 6 weeks scares me a little. Although I know my God is so huge, the enamy of my soul tries to creep into my thoughts and convince me that I am ill prepared--God does't call the prepared he prepares the called. Acts 4:13 "When they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus." that I can't be used--Acts 5:38-39 "For if their purpose or activity is of human origin, it will fail. But if it is from God, you will not be able to stop these men; you will only find yourselves fighting against God." that I am not going for the right reasons--Philippians 1:18 "But what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice." that I will be in over my head--Ephesians 3:20-21 "Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. that I have other things to do during that time Ecclesiastes 3:1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: 

God calls me to go above and beyond for His kingdom.

2 Timothy 1:8-10

So do not be ashamed to testify about our Lord, or ashamed of me his prisoner. But join with me in suffering for the gospel, by the power of God, who has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time, but it has now been revealed through the appearing of our Savior, Christ Jesus, who has destroyed death and has brought life and immortality to light through the gospel.

seeking

I talked about in a post a while back about wanting to go to Africa and that I felt the God was nudging me in the direction of Uganda. I also posted about my cousin Tyler being in Uganda a few weeks ago. My whole family got together Sunday to celebrate birthdays. We started telling different stories about mission trips and Tyler began to tell us about Uganda. The whole time he was talking I felt the presence of Christ. Then, my cousin Morgan (Tyler's sister) started telling me about this girl who lives in Uganda and that she was probably going to go there next summer for 4 to 6 weeks as an intern. I was instantly jealous. I would LOVE to do that. I didn't really say anything then because I didn't want to seem like I was trying to impose or steal her idea or anything. But later I asked her what the girl's name was and what her orginization was called just to go check out what she does. I started to read her blog and look at her site and I was literally brought to tears. Morgan mentioned maybe me going next summer too. 4-6 weeks in Uganda would be so amazing and life changing. We both agreed I would have to pray about it before being all in. The rest of the night (instead of studying like I should have) I just turned on some music and spent some time in worship. Then this morning I went to Church of the Highlands for morning prayer. It was such an incredible time of seeking God's face in this and just asking Him to show me His will in this specific area. I started to picture children, including our compassion child Helen. The mere thought of those sweet precious souls makes my heart smile for days. I feel like God is continually confirming this mission whether it be with Morgan or some other way. I love that I serve a LIVING God who can answer me when I cry out to Him and give me guidance. If I had to rely on a statue of a dead man I would go crazy. I am going to continue to pray and seek God's will in this because there is still a few months. The thought of it scares me and excites me all at the same time. I feel like God is all in it but I need to make sure He wants me to be.

so long insecurity...and computer

I had to drop off my computer at the pharmacy school so they could load some programs on there. I dropped it off wednesday morning and still haven't gotten it back. Since its friday, I won't have it back until at least monday. This is terrible timing to be without my computer. I have finals in less than one week and have slides galore to look through. Everything else I can handle since I have a mini computer as a cell phone but I can't get on blackboard on my phone. This is putting me behind on studying and stressing me out. However, since I am without my computer I started reading a book. Not one that's required for pharmacy school (like I should) but a Beth Moore book called So Long,Insecurity. I started reading it and I'm obsessed. I have already teared up once and I am only on page 60. I read it for only an hour and I had to force myself to stop reading it and start looking over anatomy. When I am done reading it, I'll post what God taught me. So far, its that everyone is insecure, jealousy is the direct result of some sort of threat, and that God is THE ONLY security that is absolutely permanent. There is no man, friend, family member, association,etc. That will never disappoint you. If you place those unrealistic expectations on those relationships, then you're doomed for insecurity. No person or thing can live up to perfection. Only Christ. I am most definitely insecure about a lot of things so I can't wait to get into and finish this book!

stethoscope

So I officially feel like I am on my way to becoming

DR. Blackshear

I am picking out my stethoscope and sphygmomanometer (blood pressure cuff). I have gotten all of my shots so I don't catch things from my patients. I have turned in all of my paperwork. I have even read one of the books. However, none of those things made me feel like it was any different than normal. Picking out a stethoscope is definitely feeling different. I am officially going to begin professional school. I am going to be working towards my Doctorate! It still doesn't seem real but I am sure that it will hit me very soon after I start. This is a big deal and a HUGE blessing. I will not take a moment of it for granted...including picking out my pink stethoscope :)

worry wart

I made the dutch oven bread. The bottom was so hard I had to just cut it off, but the rest is delicious! I will definitely be making that again. Maybe there is something I can do to make the bottom a little softer...hopefully :)  I also FINALLY painted the armoire! I bought a paint sprayer and it was a breeze! Here is a before and after.

There are so many changes that will be happening in my life in the next 2 weeks. Josh is moving dow the road, I am getting a new roommate named Saige and losing my roommate Claire, Josh will be a year older (23! Old man!), and I am going to graduate undergrad and start Harrison School of Pharmacy. It is all a little strange. It is all scary but exciting at the same time. I like change, I really do, but when it is actually time to change I get a little stressed. By far the most stressful to me is starting pharmacy school. While I am extremely thankful that I got in and I am so ready to start, I am worried. I did not have the easiest time getting through my difficult undergrad classes. Then I see people who breezed through the classes I thought were so hard, and theyre struggling through pharmacy school. This makes me believe I have no hope.Then i read something that said worry and fear is essentially doubting God. Wow. How stinkin true is that?! When I worry that I will fail out of pharmacy school I am doubting that God is with me and will give me the tools that I need to do well. When I think about other people's performance I am taking credit away from the fact that God already got me into a very competitive program. People I know would LOVE to take my place in a heartbeat and I am worrying. God got me in and He WILL not fail me once I get there. No matter what the devil tries to make me believe, God is powerful and He is bigger than any test I will ever take. He got me here and he will bless me in this time in my life. I pray everyday that I can find peace in that knowledge. I cannot let worry be an issue. I refuse to be a worry wart.

disney, moving, and almond buttercream

It has been a pretty busy week. Last Wednesday, Josh drove and I rode the whole 8 hour trip to Orlando. We talked and sang and got Slurpees at 7-eleven. We had so much fun just getting there. The next day we got up SUPER early and spent the entire day at Islands of Adventure. The Hulk has got to be one of the best roller coasters I have ever ridden. The way it shoots you out of that tunnel is crazy. We rode everything we wanted to and even got to do everything in the wizarding world of harry potter (if you have seen the lines you know how big of a deal that is). I am not a harry potter fan myself but it was still neat. Dad even treated everyone to a Hard Rock Cafe dinner. Josh loved it because they had so much Beatles, Zeppelin, and Pink Floyd stuff. They even have a Lennon room at their hotel. Then the next day (my BIRTHDAY!) we went to Magic Kingdom. I have never been before so it felt like my 6th birthday instead of my 22nd. We saw Mary Poppins, the queen of hearts and the I'm late rabbit from Alice in Wonderland, Snow White, Cinderella, and we even got our picture taken with Woody and Jessie. The parade was awesome and the fireworks were so good. Needless to say we have lots of pictures for Josh's niece, Tesney. Saturday, we made the long drive back again. We ended up barely listening to music because we were just talking the whole time. The whole trip was so much fun. It was good to spend time with my family. It is just so great that my parents love Josh (especially my dad) and Josh loves them. Sundat we made it to church even though we were both so so tired and it was so great. Being in fellowship with other believers is just so refreshing.

Josh is moving into a new duplex like a street away from me so that will be convenient. We have been packing up his house now and it is so crazy. Boys are jusr so dirty. Its like it never occurs to them that they might want to clean the fridge every so often. So now we have a little over a week to get his house squeaky clean. Hopefully we can get it done in time. I have been making him throw away things because I refuse to let him become a hoarder :) We made a huge donation to the thrift store yesterday and I have a few more huge garbage bags full to take tomorrow. Out with the old is the moving motto this next week.

Today I decided to finally paint my armoire and I needed strong Joshua to come help me drag it outside. For his payment I decided to make him a little lunch. I made hamburgers, homemade french fries, and homemade ranch dip. For dessert I bought a stars and stripes funfetti cake. Those who know me understand my love affair with funfetti cake. I started the cake and it got me in the mood to bake. I bought the fixings for wedding cake and Dutch Oven Bread. I haven't made the bread yet but the wedding cake was THE BOMB! I kinda stole the recipe so I wasn't quite sure about eveything I wrote down but I decided to wing it. It was my first attempt at the cake and the icing but it turned out to be my new love! The icing is a homemade almond buttercream icing. It is so rich and delicious. I made it super late tonight and made claire get off the phone and kim get dressed to come out and try it. It is like a wedding cake it is so good. The cakes themselves kinda fell apart but i fixed it up pretty nice. Needless to say house 69 is overflowing with baked goods so come over and eat friends! I am going to try the Dutch Oven Bread tomorrow since Joshua bought me a dutch oven for my birthday.

I have no idea what my next little food adventure is going to be but I hope it is half as good as this wedding cake turned out to be.

Kampala

Most of you have probably heard about the recent bombings in Kampala, Uganda.

  

This picture is from a restaurant called Ethiopian Village.

There were tons of people at this restaurant watching the World Cup when a bomb went off killing many innocent people. Some people were injured but some people miraculously walked away without a scratch. Some of those people were people from Alabama. Read their real life stories af what happened. Catherine's blog and Allen's blog. These blogs literally moved me to tears. God is too incredible for words. The news stories are horrifying and I absolutely CANNOT imagine living through it personally. My cousin Tyler was also in Kampala at the time of the bombings. He was not close to the actual bombings though, thank God. His team has not been there long but they are staying despite the bombings. They are going to change their plans a little bit but they are going to continue to share Jesus with the people of Africa. He is the one they so desperately need and there is no better time than now. Please keep Tyler Werk and his team in your prayers. Pray for their safety and that God uses them in a HUGE God-sized way. God can and will use this event that is of the devil to bring the lost to Him. I cannot wait to hear Tyler's stories of God's greatness when he gets home. Until then, I am trusting God with Tyler's impact on those he comes in contact with and with his safety.

Here I am, send me.

Im sure that everyone knows about The Nutty Bavarian. They have little nut stands in every mall pretty much and they always annoy you. They even have them in Brazil. I know because I took a picture. Well their stuff is really good. Shady...yes but good nonetheless. Well my love of recipes has rubbed off on Josh. He found a recipe. We made it last night. It. Was. AMAZING. We did pecans. We had to control ourselves and not eat them all so we could save some fro our trip to Orlando this week. I was a little skeptical about the recipe, especially when we were making it. It turned out great and I think we just found a new favorite thing. For now anyway.

Today's sermon at church was so good. Pastor Chris talked about Defining moments and how they can shape us in either a positive or negative way. They can either make us run from God or run TO God. He used Isaiah 6:1. He talked about how we have to ask God to show us the areas in our lives that are not of him (Jeremiah 17:9-10, Psalm 139:32-24). When we ask he will show us but we will see that gap between us and Christ. We then have to ask Him to cleanse us of those things (1 John 1:8-9). But those 2 things are for a purpose. We need him to show us and cleanse us so that he can SEND us (1 Peter 2:9-10). We are created for a purpose and that is to know Christ and make Him known. This does not necessarily have to be going to other countries. You can DO right here where God has placed you in this moment. Don't let the defining moments push you away from Christ. Run to Him in those times of troubles and tragedies. Remember He is FOR you. Romans 8:31 If God is for us, who can be against us?

Kari Jobe--You Are For Me
So faithful
So constant
So loving and so true
So powerful in all you do

You fill me
You see me
You know my every move
You love for me to sing to you

I know that you are for me
I know that you are for me
I know that you will never forsake me in my weakness

I know that you have come down
Even if to write upon my heart
To remind me who you are
So patient
So gracious
So merciful and true
So wonderful in all you do

You fill me
You see me
You know my every move
You love for me to sing to you

chairs

Tonight after Josh got off work we had a little date night. We went to see Despicable Me. It was SO SO very good. I laughed, and i even teared up a little at the end. I would, and probably will, recommend it to everyone! After that when I got home, I was looking at this cute little chair thats similar to my zebra chair and I got to thinking. I already have the zebra chair, and if I get this one I only need a couple more to put around a table. I started bbm-ing Josh and I asked him if we could could have a black table with all different chairs when we (eventually) get married. He said yes and I promised that I wouldn't make our house too girly because I know he would hate that. Then I thought....I LOVE that even though we know we can't even really think about getting married for quite a while because of school, it doesn't freak Josh out to talk about future things. I seem to talk about it alot lately since I feel like everyone but me is getting married or even just engaged. I am sure sometimes he wants to smack me, but I like the thought that I can talk about my future house with the person who I want to live in it with. It is a good enough feeling since I can't join in all the ring and wedding planning excitement with everyone else right now. My time will come and when it does I will have a black table with all different chairs...and Josh.

give it up

We have to read a book for HSOP orientation called Lies and Self Deception. Its cool how God uses anything to teach us. I have only read the first 30 pages and I already got a lesson. Even while reading this book that I am ill that I have to read in the first place, God grabs my attention and teaches me something. Basically the whole gist of it is that when you aren't being sincere, people feel it and they react to the feeling not the words. No matter what you're saying or even how you are saying it, your true feelings always come through. This is true also in our daily walk. Sometimes you try to just put on a smile and act like everything is fine when inside you are crumbling. I know I do this at times. I did it from the time I got deferred to the time I got accepted. I tried to act like it was fine and that I was ok with not being quite good enough but I wasn't. And people could tell. There have been plenty of situations where I was all fine and dandy on the surface but when I came home I cried for an hour. Sometimes all you need is for someone to sense that and be a shoulder to cry on. I am beyond blessed to have some pretty amazing friends, a completely understanding boyfriend, and a wonderful family. Sometimes I try to run to them first for help. However, I have the ultimate comfort just a whisper away. When I just go to Christ with it first it always ends up better than I could have imagined. Even if there is no resolution there is a sense of peace and a hope that no matter what happens....God is with us. Just talking it out with the One who is in control is indescribable. No matter what we are going through He is there. Sometimes we have a ton to say. Sometimes we only have a few words. Sometimes all we can do is sit and cry. God knows the words that our tears are saying.

Desert Song--Hillsong
This is my prayer in the desert
When all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in my hunger and need
My God is the God who provides
This is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flame

I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

This is my prayer in the battle
When triumph is still on its way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be emptied again
The seed I've received I will sow

God always knows what is going on inside even when you can fool everyone else. He is still God and we will always have a reason to worship Him.
1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." Just give it up.

firecracker

This weekend was so much fun. Friday, both me and Josh were off work/school so we hung out all day. We ran some errands, saw Grown Ups, made a delicious dinner, and then went back to my house and I made flag cupcakes while josh watched tv with my roommate Claire. Saturday I worked at Josh's CVS. It was a little weird. Their store is set up completely different and they do things pretty different too. It was cool to do something different though. I hear his stories but seeing it for myself was a completely different thing. It was also weird riding to work with Josh and working with him. I'm used to only being able to text him at work. We did the same thing today. Working on the holiday stinks but that time and a half intern pay is too good to worry about it :) Although it was weird, it was alot of fun. I just like being with josh even if I'm filling prescriptions while he is typing them in. After we got off we came back to my house and made hot dogs, homemade french fries, and pizza dip. It was so delicious and PERFECT for today. The fries were so so good. We bought a french fry cutter thing that was a complete waste of money. I ended up just cutting them with a knife like I should have from the beginning and it was much easier. After dinner, we went to the fireworks at the park with my roommates. It was pretty good for Auburn. They were big, they were pretty, and there were alot of them. I was impressed. Overall, it was a really good 4th of July weekend. And it isn't over yet. I don't have class tomorrow (for some reason) which means i get to sleep in!

ugandals

These magazine necklaces, bracelets, and even shoes must be all the rage in uganda because I found another site that sells them thanks to KD. The site is called 31 bits. They sell all different types of necklaces and bracelets. There is also a link on their site to Ugandals by Reef. I love Reef shoes. I have a couple of pairs. These shoes have the little magazine beads on the front of them. My goodness they are so cute. Check them out here. It is so cool that there are ways that you can help from home. Sponsor a child, buy a necklace, buy shoes. There are so many ways to just help. If you are going to buy jewelry or shoes anyway, why not help out some Ugandan women at the same time? Galatians 2:10 "All they asked was that you remember the poor, the very thing I was eager to do".

in a box

Over the past few days in my quiet time, I have been reading in Galatians. Chapter 2 really hit me hard. It talks about how "by their hypocrisy even Barnabas was led astray" (2:13). Paul calls Peter out in front of everyone and he says "You are a Jew, yet you live like a Gentile and not like a Jew. How is it, then, that you force Gentiles to follow Jewish customs?" It is so detrimental to the cause of Christ when a Christian says one thing but does another. How can we tell others about Jesus and the things he tells us if we don't follow them ourselves. There are things that the Lord tells us not because he doesn't want us to have fun, but because he loves us and knows us personally. There are things he wants to protect us from. It might not be the "cool thing" or you might be "lame" but hey even Edward Cullen waits until he's married to have sex :) Even if you think noone knows what you do, people will always find out and it always does damage to what you say. I know it is so cliche but you really may be the only Jesus some people see. Whether it is at work, at school, or even at home, you never who is watching and listening to you. At SWITCH (church or the highlands high school ministry) we talked about the 1 Corinthians box. It is a reference for whenever you need to make a choice. There are 4 sides to the box and 4 verses.

The Verses: (NLT)

1 Corinthians 10:32 Don't give offense to Jews or Gentiles or the church of God

1 Corinthians 6:12 You say "I am allowed to do anything"--but not everything is good for you. And even though "I am allowed to do anything," I must not become a slave to anything.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 Don't you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price so you must honor God with your body.

1 Corinthians 8:13 So if what I eat causes another believer to sin, I will never eat meat again as long as I live--for I don't want to cause another believer to stumble.

Put any decision in the box. If you break a side, you should not do whatever it is in the box. But if you can keep it in the box then it is probably ok. If you are in a situation and you're unsure, just put it in the box.

here, there, and everywhere

This past weekend we went camping with some friends from Josh's work. We went to Pine Mountain, Georgia. It was so beautiful up there. Fire hot, but still very fun. We went swimming, had some delicious food, made smores, and even had a midnight rave with some glow sticks. I had a really good time. Next time we will know to bring a fan :)

A couple of weeks ago I posted that I had a little to do list of projects that I wanted to get done. Well I got most of it done but when I painted the tv stand it didnt quite turn out the way I wanted it to and now I am a little worried to paint my armoire. I really love the piece of furniture and I just can't imagine ruining it. I am eventually going to paint it but I am so nervous now after the disaster that is the tv stand. good thing i only paid 5 bucks for the thing or i would be so mad. So sometime soon I WILL paint the thing.

My birthday is in 2 1/2 weeks! On July 16th I will be the big double duece. I always get excited about my birthday and it is always a pretty big deal. Last year Josh woke me up with flowers and made me breakfast and then I spent the day with mel and stacie. I bought a tiny little bottle of alcohol just because I could and then poured it down the drain because I don't drink. What a waste of money. haha. That night Josh took me to Sips n Strokes. They made fun of us because it was my 21st birthday and I had a gatorade and josh had a water. we painted this cool picture and we had so much fun.

This year my family is going to Orlando on the week of my birthday so after I get out of class me and Josh will be driving to orlando to stay a few days. We're going to Magic Kingdom,Islands of Adventure, and Busch Gardens. I cannot wait. My dad practically begged Josh to go because they are new BFFs. It is really funny how alike they are. They get along so well and that is one of the things I love about Josh. My family loves him. All of them think he is so great and that super important to me. It will be so much fun to have roller coaster fun with Josh and the fam for my birthday.

A few weeks after my birthday, I GRADUATE! I am a little later than most but only one semester behind isn't bad. I actually graduate on Josh's birthday so it will be a very fun celebratory day. I just have to get through A&P II and Comparative first.

Then the day after I graduate, we start pharmacy school. Not even a day break but I cannot wait. I have worked so hard to get here and it is finally time. Hallelujah!

The next month and half will probably be the busiest of my life but i cannot wait for all of it. I am just enjoying this time in my life.

listen

Dave Barnes
God Gave Me You
10,000 Children
Since You Said I Do
Until You
More Than a Man
Nothing Fancy
I Have And I Always Will

Matt Wertz
Sing My Lonesome Away
With You Tonight
I Will Not Take My Love Away
Over You

Marc Broussard
The Wanderer
The Beauty of Who You Are
Why Should She Wait
Gavin's Song


Three amazing musicians and of course 3 of my favorites. I listed a few of my favorite songs so check them out. If theres no link you just need to download it and listen to it :)

On a heavier note, I got a message from Lauren Huff this morning. She has been having alot of abdominal troubles and they are going to do some more tests. Please send up a few extra prayers for Huffy. Pray for God's healing first of all but also pray for peace for Lauren. I am sure this is a very stressful, worrying time and she needs to feel the arms of Christ around her. Our God is so big.
Here are the Lyrics of a song by Jeremy Camp called The Healing Hand of God:

I have seen the many faces
I fear in the pain
I have watched the tears fall plenty
From heart ache and strain
So if life's journey
Has you weary and afraid
There's rest in the shadow of His wings
I have walked through the valleys
The mountains and plains
I have held the hand of freedom
It washes all my stains
If you feel the weight of many trials
And burdens from this world
There's freedom in the shelter of the Lord.

I have seen the healing hand of God
Reaching out and mending broken hearts
Taste and see the fullness of his peace
And hold on to what's being held out
The healing hand of God

I have touched the scars upon his hands to see if they were real
He has walked the road before me he knows just how i feel
When you feel there is not anyone who understands your pain
Just remember all of Jesus' suffering

Cast all your cares on Him for He cares for you
He's near to the broken and confused
By His stripes our spirit is renewed
So enter in the joy prepared for you.

uganda and worry

About a month ago I ordered a Uganda necklace. I ordered one for Stacie for her birthday and one for myself because I liked it. When I went home the next time my mom showed me the picture of our family's compassion child. Her name is Helen Buwala. She is from Uganda. What a God thing. Even though she might not ever know about the uganda necklaces I still thought it was very cool that I now have a reminder to pray for Helen and her family. Just one more way God is preparing my heart to go to Africa (eventually).

There is a lady who taught the women how to make the necklaces, her name is Katie. She has a blog and it is really powerful. Keep her in your prayers for sure. Check it out here

For info about ordering the necklaces go here

I had a pretty discouraged day the other day. The end result of Mammalian really knocked me down. Because I couldn't pull 3 more points, I finished the semester with a 69.5 and no opportunity to round up (i tried). This meant that I have to take mammalian all over again in pharmacy school. I was already worried about how I would do and then this happened. most days I tell myself that God got me in and He will not fail me once I get there. But then there are the days that the enemy gets into my head and tells me that I cannot do it. I feel discouraged, scared, worried, angry, upset, stressed, and the list goes on. It is on these days that I have to run from the devil and back into the refuge of Christ. Like I said...GOD got me in. I didn't get me in. If you know my GPA you would know for sure that I can't take the credit and I think that is how it should be. I can't help but to give Him all the glory for that. I didn't do it alone and I won't be doing it alone for the next 4 years either. Deuteronomy 31:8 says "The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." He will do what he promises and I have to trust that always. I cannot be afraid or discouraged. Romans 8:28 "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose". He called me and He will help me through it. It will not be easy and the enemy will try to bring me down. But Christ is in control and there is so much peace in that knowledge.

change

2 days ago i went to my best friend's wedding. it was so beautiful. it was so much fun and sweet as could be. congratulations ashley and jared mills! after they get back from their honeymoon they're moving super far away to kansas city, missouri. although i am sad that i won't get to see her for quite a while, God has huge plans for them there. it got me thinking about change. everyone hates change. i like change most times but only when i want to change. God has other plans. he wants us to change when it is good for him and most often bad for us. we will try to resist but we have to have faith and know that God is who he says he is and that he will not fail us. 2 corinthians 3:18 says "so all of us that have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. and the Lord--who is the spirit--makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image." we must change to be more and more like Christ. we live in a sinful world and what the world tells us we should do are not what the Lord tells us. so we must change. change our hearts, change our minds, change our actions. change. we can't be just living in the world. we must always be changing to be more like him and show him to the world that so desperately needs him and his love. embrace the change.

things to come

so as most of you probably already know, i love missions of any sort. when i graduate from pharmacy school i want to go on medical missions trips. i went on alternative spring break last year and also went to brazil for 10 days and they were both so incredible. i was going to go back this year but the dates got changed so i will already be in summer classes. once i found out that i would be going yet another summer without a mission trip i started looking towards summer of 2011. pharmacy school does not have summer classes. there are a few along the way that you can take but i won't be doing that :) church of the highlands normally has a mission trip to africa every summer and i really just felt God lay that on my heart. its always pretty expensive but God showed that money was no option when it came to paying for brazil so that is not even one of my worries. i am and will be doing things in the meantime to prepare both my heart and my bank account. i will share one of those things shortly (after i give stacie her birthday present.) i just know that somehow some way i will be in africa next summer if thats where the Lord continues to lead me. please keep me in your prayers as i continue on this journey.
i finished up my finals on friday. thank goodness. but then i had to wor 20 hours this weekend. now i have a one week break in between today and going to the beach with josh's family which i cannot wait for. during that one week i have a list of things to get done. i bought a fabulous armoire at the thrift store (the best) but right now it is a gross yellow-ish color so i need it to be black and awesome and to have new curtains on the doors of it. i also picked up a wrought iron stool off my neighbors curb and i need to paint it. i have already recovered and repadded it but it still needs some work. the last thing is my tv stand. it brown and needs to be black.
so here is my list:
*paint armoire
*sew curtains
*paint stool
*paint tv stand
i will post before and afters when everything is done. pray the rain doesnt ruin my plans.
i also think that my lola cat is going to be a mommy. i am not 100% sure but im like 90%. shes been acting strange in both good and bad ways. shes been very very snuggly but then shes peed in the bathtub like 3 times. shes very weird but hopefully she is with child :) having little kittens for a few weeks would be so much fun. so if you know anyone who wants one i will keep you posted.
p.s. congrats to annilee! i cannot wait to meet baby number 2!

x marks the spot

exes. almost everyone has them. most of them are terrible. some people are actually friends with their exes. if they are exes from middle school or if you only dated for like 2 weeks then thats a possibility. however, if you dated recently or for a long period of time i will never understand how you can be "just friends". you come to know that person as more than a friend and that is the type of relationship that cannot go backwards. so you have to end it completely. some people do not understand this fact. in the past year or so i have encountered quite a few people who just don't get it. you are the ex and it is going to stay that way. it is even worse when your ex looks like old gregg or ursula from the little mermaid. you dont want to tell them "listen i dont want to be friends because i am embarassed that we even went out" but they just do not get it. so i am going to help everyone out for the future. here it goes.

attention exes: it is not ok to call/text/facebook/email once your no longer significant other tells you it is over. if they talk to you first, fine. you also should not call and hang up because they automatically assume it is you once it comes up private number or as "dont answer" because they have you saved that way. it is also not ok to continue to call/text/facebook/email once they tell you "do not call me anymore...you are driving me crazy". the most not ok thing to do is to contact their new significant other especially if he/she is a person that you have never met in your life. this includes talking about books, music, school, plans after graduation, or even about life in general. just because you went out with someone does not put you in the middle of their new relationship. if i start dating someone, i do not care what his ex has to say. most people understand that you were "in love" with this person so you are having to get over them but they are completely over you. they probably deleted your pictures, burned your scrapbook, notes, that dumb stuffed animal and haven't thought about you again. if you still have pictures of your ex, delete them. still having pictures on facebook or even on your computer is completely weird. you need to finally face the fact that both the relationship and your friendship is over and move on. just know if you don't want your feelings hurt or if you dont want people to say you are a crazy...dont be one. its that simple.